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20040509 Peter Prothero Loving yourself

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%??(???Learning to love yourself??5You shall love your neighbour
as yourself Matt 22.39???Why is this an issue???uMore families today are broken and/or disfunctional
20% are abusive in some way
60% of first-born children in Denmark have unmarried parents. The End of Marriage in Scandinavia by Stanley Kurtz 02/02/2004, Volume 009, Issue 20
25% increase in cohabiting couples with children. With fewer parents marrying, what used to show up in statistical tables as early divorce is now the unrecorded breakup of a cohabiting couple with children.
Suicide is the third leading cause of death for teenagers aged 15-19.
Fyn - 131 per 100,000 young men attempted suicide in 1998: the corresponding number for young women is 293. CPHPOST.DK ApS
?6vZ?" 4 ??n&
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The impact??TChildren as the victims are left looking for love and identity. The traditional place for finding this is being destroyed around them.
The message they have received is that they are not worth loving, something must be wrong  with them.
If others don t love them why should they love themselves?

?++???Our Inner Dialogue??I want to be loved unconditionally but
I don t like what I see
I want to be accepted for who I am but
I don t know who I am
I wish I could& &
? ?P? ???The Search for Reality??|People are longing for reality and spirituality. These are no longer incompatible goals.
They are looking for authenticity in themselves, in others and in their relationships.
Faking it is not a long term sustainable option.
Jesus went to people who had failed or were rejected and on the fringes of society, yet they all recognised an authentic spirituality in Him. He was real.?}}???How do we measure worth???zAchievement  success, notoriety, fame
Popularity  being part of the  in crowd
Wealth  money, cars, houses
Appearance  looks, beauty, fitness, clothes
Status  titles, position, symbols??????Avril Lavigne - Complicated?$??? Uha, life s like this, Uha, uha, that s the way it is  cause life s like this, uha, uha, that s the way it is
Chill out, what ya yelling for, lay back, it s all been done before, and if, you could only let it be, you would see, I like, you the way you are, when we re, driving in your car and you re talking to me one on one, but you become, somebody else, round everyone else, you re watching your back, like you can t relax, you re trying to be cool, you look like a fool to me.?&???t0(a???
??j Tell me, why d you have to go and make things so complicated, I see the way your acting like you re somebody else gets me frustrated, life s like this, you, you fall and you crawl and you break and you take what you get and you turn it into, honesty promise me I m never going to find you fake it, No, no, no
You come, over unannounced, dressed up, like you re somthing else, where you aren t where it s at you see you re making me laugh out when you strike your pose, take off all your prepy cloths, you know you re not fooling anyone when you become somebody else, round everyone else, you re watching your back, like you can t relax, you re trying to be cool, you look like a fool to me.
? ?Z??@kv`g ? ??The consequences??All of these culturally defined expectations produce incredible stress on young people as it is beyond the ability of most of them to achieve these goals.
Peer pressure adds to the stress as this is the time we need acceptance and affirmation the most.
For them the world becomes defined in terms of winners and losers, haves and have nots, givers and takers.
The rewards are great but the penalties are harsh.
As we get older we cope better but the basic issues can remain unresolved, we simply get more adept at hiding them.??O??  ?
??How does God measure worth???^Gen 1.27 Each person has an intrinsic value because we are made in His image.
Gen 4.7 Sin is an enemy that has marred the image and seeks to destroy each life
1Sam 16.7 God sees beyond the outward appearance to the heart of a person.
1Cor 13.1-3 Not only is it the heart God looks at but the heart gives or removes value from all that we say and do.
?_Z_? ??The Gospel Story??Proof of the infinite value God places on people - Jn 3.16
We have the power to love because we have received love - 1Jn 4.19
We learn to love what God loves and that begins with us - 1Jn 4.9-10
When we love others it is proof that we love ourselves - Eph 5.28-29??3?? ??Human self-love is:???A narsistic pre-occupation with self
An ego driven display of self-importance
An immature attention seeking strategy
Amnon  2Sam 13.1-20
Absolom  2Sam 14.25-26;15.1-6
Ahab  1Kings 21.1-7
Euodia & Syntyche - Phil 4.2????b j- ?
??!Biblical self-love is rooted in: ???God s love for us - Rev 1.5, Gal 2.20
The acceptance we receive in Christ - Rom 15.7
Trust in God s distribution of gifts & talents - 1Cor 12.14-25
A knowledge of who we are, our origin and where we are going, our sense of destiny - Jn 13.3-5

?????
???Changing our inner dialogue??~Acknowledge negative feelings and beliefs about yourself
Repent and ask for forgiveness  to keep them is to continue to believe a lie
Seek prayer and counsel - Jms 5.16
Meditate on Biblical truth, Ps 139  we change the way we feel by changing the way we think  Rom 12.2
Look at Jesus not within - Heb 12.2; 2Cor 3.18?@@????
??)Helping others change their self-concept?**(??(Affirm who they are in Christ - You are Peter& Matt 16.17
The power of changing a name:
Jacob - Israel
Benoni - Benjamin
Joseph - Barnabas
Accept people as they are and trust the Holy Spirit to change them. Don t do His job!
Play to peoples strengths, cover their weaknesses
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